Thursday, September 22, 2011

CLEAN, Y'Hawr! . . .(mateys?)

Recently, I was trying to explain in a facebook chat why I loved Clean fragrances more than anything.  I said, “They smell like fresh laundry.”  Friend replied, “Why do you pay money for that?  Have you tried just doing laundry?” So I looked up their description on Sephora to help me explain the allure:
"Brazilian* Orange, Mexican Lime, Fresh Mown Grass, Cyclamen, Rose Otto, Night Blooming White Jasmine, Petals, Heliotrope, Musk."
All of them, Warm Cotton, Fresh Laundry, Skin, are like this.  Utter description fail.  I get none of that.  What IS Cylamen and how would I know if I smelled like it? 
Oh well, guess they couldn’t just say “Downy” because I’m betting that’s patented.  But seriously, Downy.**  It’s wonderful. 
And since recently there’s a Sephora in my new town (not just 1, mind, but 3 all at once) I can now return to my regularly scheduled program of buying these fuckers in bulk. 
Who needs to shower when you can bottle freshness***!

*Am I alone in seriously doubting that anyone, even freaky 1,000 watt sniff testers, can tell the difference between a Brazilian or a Floridian orange?  They both wear teeny weeny bikinis last I checked.

**Now I'm kinda wondering if I go to Downy's website, will their description include rose otto and/or night blooming white jasmine?  No.  But I feel that I should point up the fact that Clean Fragrances will not fight "pesky static cling."

***Note: please don’t actually do that. That is a crap plan. Not that it was your plan, I just don’t want to be the person you point to if called out on said hypothetical plan’s craptasticness

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